Sunday, June 16, 2013

No, You DO NOT Fuck With Me


 WARNING: THIS IS A VERY LONG ONE -- I NEED TO VENT --



because if you have nothing better to do than stalk MINE, poke and prod at every little detail and then write about it, you have a sad, sorry existence.

Lately, certain people [or shall I say ‘person’, because every single post is exactly the same] has taken it upon themselves to dissect every single thing I say and try to use it to belittle me. Honestly, all this does is make me laugh and shake my head. Especially because it’s done ‘anonymously’. These people [or again, person] is obviously aware of my myspace and facebook. And yet uses a means in which you are anonymous to attempt to ‘talk shit’. Which doesn’t work, by the way.

I don’t understand people who stalk you on every website, if they are only hating on you. What’s the point?! And what the hell makes you so bitter?! I have never met you but obviously I have made a pretty large impact on your life if you take so much time out of it to brush up on mine. The funny thing is, I don’t know, nor do I care who you are. You, on the other hand, revolve your online life around me. Who is the clear winner there??

It’s just funny when said person tries to say things like I represent all ‘typical Chicago girls’ by being slutty, going to clubs, drinking and getting drunk, hooking up with guys….. I mean really?! If you’re so adamant on stalking my life, then you obviously know none of these things are even close to true. So the fact that you pull that kind of shit out of your ass just for attention is astounding.

First, I haven’t even stepped foot into a club or anything even similar in my life-- the only club i have ever been to is Club Soda when I was 14! They are crowded, annoying, filled with smoke and obnoxiously drunk people who do nothing but boast about or act as if they have some sort of enviable ‘status’ and I want no part of it. If I go out, it’s to a hole in the wall sushi bar or my favorite karaoke spot. Not some stupid, played out downtown club. It’s not my scene.

Secondly, I don’t get drunk. Mainly because it’s way too expensive for me to attempt it. I have an extremely high alcohol tolerance and I have no interest in meeting it. On the occasion I am with good friends and there is champagne or we sake bomb or have some margaritas, then I will have a few. But it’s very rare that you will find me ‘drunk’.
Third, I never, absolutely NEVER hook up with guys. Even when I didn’t have my man, I am NOT about some little douche bag fucker who thinks he’s the shit trying to hook up with girls. I never even let guys TALK to me let alone think they are making any kind of physical contact near me. Guys make me sick and I am EXTREMELY picky about who I let into my life. I do not ‘hook up’. If I let a guy get close to me, he is there for a while. Period.

Fourth, if you even LOOK at my pictures, everything I do is something like going to a museum, the zoo, or at a friends house. So I mean really, this ‘slutty, trashy club girl’ shit is just ridiculous. Why don’t you photograph me at these places then we’ll talk.

So if you have something to say, then grow some fucking balls and say it to ME. What the hell are you so scared of?! You obviously don’t know me, so why do you care about me knowing who you are? You apparently like to watch my every move, so, you live a sad life, but at least have the nerve to NOT do it anonymously like a scared little PUSSY. It’s so pathetic.

It’s especially funny that anyone like this thinks they affect my life in any way, or think it makes me feel bad about myself at ALL. It actually makes me feel incredibly good about myself, because I know my life isn’t as unfulfilled as yours. I don’t fill my life with jealousy and hate toward someone I know nothing about and then cyber-stalk them and try my best to garner their attention. If I have something not so nice to say about someone, it’s because I’ve just read about them saying or doing something stupid and I have an opinion. If I want to say Heidi Montag is a fucking fool for getting DDD tits and that much work done on her face then I will. But I sure don’t stalk her life and try to anonymously say some stupid bullshit to her. I have better things to do with my time.


And as far as my attitude goes, once again… YOU DO NOT KNOW ME. What are you even basing this ‘fake’ accusation on?! So ridiculous. I don’t try to ever be something I’m not. I will be the first to admit I am a klutz, random, ridiculous, witty, and sometimes bitchy human being. But anyone will tell you, I am very in tune with my conscience, and get sick at even the thought of people not recycling. I think of others before I think of myself. When it comes to Christmas, I NEVER disappoint because I pay attention all year long and I pick up on things and I store them in my memory. So people are genuinely surprised and happy with what I give them, which usually ends up being a lot. I spoil the people around me because it makes me happy to give. I think of strangers when I’m in the passengers seat. I like people to be courteous and treat to be treated. If I don’t finish a meal at a restaurant, I have it bagged up to give to a homeless person I may see on the way home. I don’t like to see food go to waste when there is someone on the street who will really appreciate it.


Yes I may be snappy or sarcastic or mouthy or bitchy sometimes, but the people who really DO pay attention to the things I say and read abou

Because if you have nothing better to do than stalk MINE, poke and prod at every little detail and then write about it, you have a sad, sorry existence.

Lately, certain people [or shall I say ‘person’, because every single post is exactly the same] has taken it upon themselves to dissect every single thing I say and try to use it to belittle me. Honestly, all this does is make me laugh and shake my head. Especially because it’s done ‘anonymously’. These people [or again, person] is obviously aware of my myspace and facebook. And yet uses a means in which you are anonymous to attempt to ‘talk shit’. Which doesn’t work, by the way.

I don’t understand people who stalk you on every website, if they are only hating on you. What’s the point?! And what the hell makes you so bitter?! I have never met you but obviously I have made a pretty large impact on your life if you take so much time out of it to brush up on mine. The funny thing is, I don’t know, nor do I care who you are. You, on the other hand, revolve your online life around me. Who is the clear winner there??

It’s just funny when said person tries to say things like I represent all ‘typical Chicago girls’ by being slutty, going to clubs, drinking and getting drunk, hooking up with guys….. I mean really?! If you’re so adamant on stalking my life, then you obviously know none of these things are even close to true. So the fact that you pull that kind of shit out of your ass just for attention is astounding.

First, I haven’t even stepped foot into a club or anything even similar in my life-- the only club i have ever been to is Club Soda when I was 14! They are crowded, annoying, filled with smoke and obnoxiously drunk people who do nothing but boast about or act as if they have some sort of enviable ‘status’ and I want no part of it. If I go out, it’s to a hole in the wall sushi bar or my favorite karaoke spot. Not some stupid, played out downtown club. It’s not my scene.

Secondly, I don’t get drunk. Mainly because it’s way too expensive for me to attempt it. I have an extremely high alcohol tolerance and I have no interest in meeting it. On the occasion I am with good friends and there is champagne or we sake bomb or have some margaritas, then I will have a few. But it’s very rare that you will find me ‘drunk’.
Third, I never, absolutely NEVER hook up with guys. Even when I didn’t have my man, I am NOT about some little douche bag fucker who thinks he’s the shit trying to hook up with girls. I never even let guys TALK to me let alone think they are making any kind of physical contact near me. Guys make me sick and I am EXTREMELY picky about who I let into my life. I do not ‘hook up’. If I let a guy get close to me, he is there for a while. Period.

Fourth, if you even LOOK at my pictures, everything I do is something like going to a museum, the zoo, or at a friends house. So I mean really, this ‘slutty, trashy club girl’ shit is just ridiculous. Why don’t you photograph me at these places then we’ll talk.

So if you have something to say, then grow some fucking balls and say it to ME. What the hell are you so scared of?! You obviously don’t know me, so why do you care about me knowing who you are? You apparently like to watch my every move, so, you live a sad life, but at least have the nerve to NOT do it anonymously like a scared little PUSSY. It’s so pathetic.

It’s especially funny that anyone like this thinks they affect my life in any way, or think it makes me feel bad about myself at ALL. It actually makes me feel incredibly good about myself, because I know my life isn’t as unfulfilled as yours. I don’t fill my life with jealousy and hate toward someone I know nothing about and then cyber-stalk them and try my best to garner their attention. If I have something not so nice to say about someone, it’s because I’ve just read about them saying or doing something stupid and I have an opinion. If I want to say Heidi Montag is a fucking fool for getting DDD tits and that much work done on her face then I will. But I sure don’t stalk her life and try to anonymously say some stupid bullshit to her. I have better things to do with my time.t me and know about me, know that I am this way and appreciate me for being REAL. I don’t give a shit who you are. If you say something stupid, I am going to let you know. It’s not my fault that half the internets population can’t form a grammatically stable sentence. Or use forms of internet ghetto slang that hurts my eyes and my brain when attempting to read it. Or ask really stupid questions or make really perverted comments or attempt to tell ME something about myself when they know nothing about me. It’s just plain ignorant. And I don’t put up with it. If I were “fake” I would slap a smile on my face and act like it’s okay to speak to me so ignorantly. Let that one swim around inside your empty head for a few minutes.







Stop sitting back and watching. Get up and DO. I can’t understand how people can live life so bitterly. It’s got to be so miserable. Maybe you weren’t held enough as a child. But don’t take out your childhood neglect on me. I am not your therapist.


If you have a solid, legit reason to hate on me, then by all means let me know because I’d love to hear it. But because I know I am a phenomenal human being, the only conclusion that I can come to is that you wish you had my life. Which is pretty damn pathetic, because I don’t do anything with mine that couldn’t be done by somebody else with a little ambition.


Get up and look in the mirror and evaluate yourself. Find out the reason you feel the need to hate on others because chances are, that’s where you’ll find it. It really makes no difference to me. I welcome the ignorance because it brings humanity into my life. And I always enjoy a good laugh. But just please don’t expect that what you say bothers, hurts or gets a rise out of me in any negative way. It doesn’t. And this blog is just to let you know how uneducated you are. Don’t try to dissect a life you know nothing about. You won’t find anything, because it’s not YOUR life. This isn’t the Truman Show. You’re not watching my every move 24 hours a day. And as you can clearly see by this blog, you’ve been quite horribly mistaken.



Now kindly shut the fuck up, or grow some balls and talk to me yourself. But this anonymous bullshit is just pathetic. Quit hiding. You know you just look like an idiot. Especially because its hardly worth an eye roll when I see such pitiful attempts at bashing. It just doesn’t work with me. It doesn’t affect me. You are definitely barking up the wrong tree.


Get a life. Stop obsessing over mine.

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

self control

i seriously have so many topics going through my mind right now, that i decided to write about none of them and instead turn to something that i have been lacking lately.

&& that is self control.

self-control is a vital part of who we are. Thoughts are our foundation because they direct our feelings. People with high self control don’t react to someone else’s emotions. They are able to think clearly and stay focused under pressure. No one can control the events or the people surrounding them, but they can control their own emotions and actions. I personally like to think i maintain self control in thee situations, but when i am alone i tend to slip.

[ x ] one thing i do to exercise my self control is choosing what i think about. when i feel i am able to control what feelings my thoughts are producing, i feel as if i am able to dictate what i will do or will not do, which in return leads me to be careful on what i dwell on.

[ x ]  i try not to let my feelings get the best of me. if, for instance, i know i am upset with someone or i am craving something i know i should not consume or have, i do something to get my mind off the situation; listen to music, write on this blog, scrapbook, write letters to my lil sister or jail bird friends ;) lol, exercise, or read to name a few. And if i still find myself dwelling on those things, i just simply pick up on another activity again.. and yes, this may take me doing this same activity several times before i am able to conquer your feelings but i eventually am able to do it.)

[ x ] this one may seem a bit obvious and silly, but really taking deep breaths is very VERY helpful. it seems to just calm me down, and also takes my mind off of it for a while. this is most helpful when i feel like i am losing my mind!

these basic little things are what i do to give myself a bit more control, and this is where perseverance comes it. it won’t be better the first time you try to have control but like everything else you will be able to control yourself better and faster with practice.

the reason why i wanted to make a blog out of this is because i'd like to point out that i don't think self control is only about keeping your cool when you are angry. it's concept is more than that, it can also be about not complaining about a situation or someone, or even waiting to get something you really want now, or even choosing not to eat that extra cookie. these situations can affect our every day lives, and that is why i believe it is important to instill self control into ourselves so our younger generations can fall onto it as well. maybe by doing this we will have less anger impulse shootings and murders going on, especially those done by teens being angry at their parents for not letting them spend the night at a friend's house one night or something minute like that... :/

a quote by Aristotle was said to me by my sophomore year English teacher that has stuck with me ever since.. it's “I count him braver who overcomes his desires than him who conquers his enemies; for the hardest victory is over self.”

the greatest victories we can have in our life is over ourselves. Self-control might be hard, but it is possible. encourage yourself and others to maintain control over themselves.

xox rica

rewindddddd....

hey lovers & friends,

i want to tell you about a messed up thing that happened to me back in the beginning of 2013, I started a blog. it was just a fun idea at first but then I slowly and steadily realized it kept me sane. through the happy times and the sad, I was able to be open and honest for the first time and it felt good. good in a way that some people only feel when they are drunk or stoned. Good like you are about to have amazing sex with a person you love. Just freaking good, okay!? I do feel blessed to be able to reach this incredible high by merely putting words together and I am confident that my friends and family understand this. what they don’t get about me is the fact that I live a double life. I am a smart, shy, modest person but there is a side of me that is extremely… extreme. i will not say, but it is not detrimental to my health, and it's not illegal. It is just something that makes me feel like I am flying and I don’t think that is so bad. this is the part where some people disagree.

Just recently, i learned that an e-mail was sent to both of my parent’s personal e-mail addresses which contained my site address. And by recently, I mean a couple of weeks ago. The person who wrote this said that my life was spiraling out of control and that I was headed down the wrong path. if you recall anything about my previous posts, you would understand that what I was writing was not for the eyes of my parents. atleast not yet. i wrote about my problems and thoughts going on in my head, that YES my parents were the root of. I was planning on publishing my work and approaching them with a book, which I consider tangible evidence that I am not heading down the wrong path. That I have been in control the whole time and I have something to show for it.

when does life ever go according to plan?

this person out there felt the need to take this matter into their own hands, something I consider selfish and vindictive. They obviously wanted to see me fall. Yes, asshole, I did fall and I felt terrible for days. You won round one. What is particularly maddening about the situation is the fact that this person is still a mystery. my parents refuse to send me the e-mail because they made a “promise” to the person that they wouldn’t. So in an effort to shield myself from the pain of betrayal, I abandoned this blog and started a new blog. A blog that hardly anyone knew about in which I wrote three posts. I talked about who I suspected of such treachery and the "harm" i was supposedly the person may have been referring to. I basically just vented. It took me a week to realize that I was being a complete coward and with that realization came the rebirth of this blog.

In conclusion, here is my FUCK YOU to the person that went behind my back.

Here is my welcoming to the site for my parents.

&& most importantly, here is round two.

xox rica